Spotlight: Creation, by Bjørn Larssen

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Creation by Bjørn Larssen
Series: Why Odin Drinks (#1)
Published: August 18, 2021
Genre: Humorous Fantasy, Satire Norse Mythology retelling
Pages: 84
CW: Contains the word “ass-thetics”
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In the beginning there was confusion.

Ever woken up being a God, but not knowing how to God properly? Your brothers keep creating mosquitoes and celery and other, more threatening weapons. What can your ultimate answer be – the one that will make you THE All-Father and them, at best, the All-Those-Uncles-We-All-Have-But-Don’t-Talk-About?

“FML! The answer’s why I drink!” – Odin

Perfect for fans of Terry Pratchett, Neil Gaiman, Thomas Hobbes of Malmesbury, and Mrs Brown’s Boys.

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Author Info

Bjørn Larssen is a Norse heathen made in Poland, but mostly located in a Dutch suburb, except for his heart which he lost in Iceland. Born in 1977, he self-published his first graphic novel at the age of seven in a limited edition of one, following this achievement several decades later with his first book containing multiple sentences and winning awards he didn’t design himself. His writing is described as ‘dark’ and ‘literary’, but he remains incapable of taking anything seriously for more than 60 seconds.

Bjørn has a degree in mathematics and has worked as a graphic designer, a model, a bartender, and a blacksmith (not all at the same time). His hobbies include sitting by open fires, dressing like an extra from Vikings, installing operating systems, and dreaming about living in a log cabin in the north of Iceland. He owns one (1) husband and is owned by one (1) neighbourhood cat.

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Spotlight & Excerpt: The Importance of Being Prudence + Giveaway

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The Importance of Being Prudence

Prudence McDaniel Series Book 1

by Elizabeth Anne Porter with Charles Porter

Genre: Paranormal Romance

 

Massachusetts. It pops up in the history books every now and then. You know, Salem, Witches, and all that. Funny how there aren’t any Salem vampires mentioned. If there were, Prudence McDaniel might not have been so shocked when several particularly fine-looking members of the species decide to visit her New Age store, the Celtic Moon. Come to think of it, Greece’s history doesn’t mention much about vampires either, but that’s where Prudence ultimately ends up, after being abruptly turned and then almost simultaneously declared the savior of the disappearing race. Wildly sexy men and fabulous castles aside, Prudence isn’t so sure she wants to carry the burden of an entire people on her shoulders, but it seems she doesn’t have much of a choice. The heavy load is eased by the ultra-hot vampires who introduce her to the new world she now inhabits and all the pleasures of an undead lifestyle. Unfortunately, as soon as she becomes attached to almost-immortality, her own life suddenly hangs in the balance. It will take every inch of Prudence’s stubborn streak to pull her through. And even if she does survive, it might be at the expense of the man she has fallen for, fangs-over-heels. Can anything be worth that?


importanceofbeingprudence - excerpt

I was pulled from my thoughts by the little bells that hung from my entrance door; those beautiful, lyrical bells.
“Pru, just look at him, sweetie. That right there is a perfect example of a sexy man. Now get your overworked, under-loved ass over there and ask if you can help him. If not for you, then do it for me. Eye candy is eye candy, after all,” Joshua whined as he leaned into me with much enthusiasm.
My best friend was a handsome man. He was a little taller than me and worked out obsessively (when there wasn’t a new man in his life). So he was compact but muscular. He had a head of tight brown ringlets that were various pastel colors at the end. His eyes changed colors as often as he changed contacts. He wasn’t a clothes horse, but his wardrobe was fabulous.
After rolling my eyes, I took a longer look at the man Joshua was gushing about. Before focusing on our latest customer, I believed that my best friend was acting a tad overdramatic.
The man in question was tall, dark, and sexy. He wore his hair in a ponytail. His face was sculptured and strong. I had to admit the man was swoon-inducing, but in my line of work, I ran into handsome men quite often. That was one of the added bonuses I really enjoyed; okay, maybe over-enjoyed. Be that as it may, I quickly learned that handsome did not necessarily mean dateable. And yet, there I stood, hoping he would be different while doubting the possibility in the same thought.

“Pru! Sweet tater! Are you paying attention?! If I thought for a second that Mr. Sex-on-a-stick was gay, I would knock a bitch down getting to him,” he purred into my ear.
“Stop it,” I demanded lightly as I pushed him away.
As soon as my hands made contact with his chest, he fell in an ungraceful heap to the floor. My completely understandable, mortified expression only garnered a sly smile from my friend. “Bet that’ll get his attention.”
“Joshua, I swear to the Gods ….”
Before I could finish what was quickly becoming a tirade, I was interrupted by the aforementioned sex-oozing man. He even smelled good. No, good was not an adequate word. He smelled like the forest on a brisk day. It was brilliant.

“Is there anything I can do to be of help?” the sex-oozing man asked as he neared my downed friend.
His voice was mesmerizing. It was deep and a bit raspy. I could hear a faint accent but had no idea where to place it. And I found myself fighting to quell the goosebumps that threatened to break out all over my body.
Watching Joshua’s reactions to the man’s closeness forced me to shift my position so that I could enjoy the view. Even if he turned out to be the kind of wildly sexy man you couldn’t date, I had to take the opportunity to look at him up close and personal. I quit trying to help my fallen friend and turned slowly to take the interruption in.
For the first time in my life, I was struck speechless, literally speechless. Open mouth, no words coming out – speechless. I desperately wanted to say anything but my brain seemed to have shut down. He smiled a smile that literally made my knees buckle.
“Good God, Prudence, get ahold of yourself,” the annoying internal voice that always tried valiantly not to make me look like an idiot, screamed.
My inner voice could form words but not me. At least I didn’t say that out loud. What was taking place at that very moment was enough embarrassment for a while.
Realizing that I wasn’t able to speak, I quickly turned back to Joshua, who was still resting on the floor, the helplessness in my face glowing.
“You will have to forgive our Ms. Pru. She sometimes has trouble making big people words,” Joshua explained as he stood up and extended his hand to the only customer in the store who was getting any attention.
Mr. Ubersexy smiled at Joshua’s comment but watched me with the kind of interest that made me feel both a little turned on and a little nervous. Luckily, I could always count on Joshua to break through the awkwardness of any given situation.
“Pru, honey, we have other customers. Are you all right now?” Joshua asked, putting his arms around me protectively.
I thought for a moment that he might be getting the same vibes from the new customer as me and then realized he was just using me to get closer to the mysterious man.
“Yes, I’m good now, thank you. Must of had a frog in my throat,” I managed to speak finally.
In answering my overdramatic friend, I sent him a “don’t say a word” look. Even though I was fully aware that what I was asking was bordering on more than my best friend could promise.
“Holler if you need any little thing. Oh, and I really hope we see you in the store again,” Joshua sang as he made a speedy exit.
“Sorry. He gets a little overexcited sometimes,” I said apologetically.
“No. It is quite all right. My name is Marcus,” he said, extending his hand to me.


Elizabeth Anne Porter was born in Ruislip, in the London borough of Hillingdon. She currently lives in Oklahoma with her pedantic husband and two literary cats.

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Book Blitz & Excerpt: The Darkest Vampire + Giveaway

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The Darkest Vampire
by Juliana Haygert
(Rite World: Vampire Wars, #1)
Publication date: October 29th 2021
Genres: New Adult, Urban Fantasy

Supernaturals around Portland are turning up dead. I’m next … if the vampire I just made a powerful bond with doesn’t kill me first. 

Magic is in a short supply for a half-witch like me, which makes things very difficult when I’m bound by a blood promise to avenge my parents.

With no leads left to follow, I make a bargain with a demon for help. Bad decision. The quest the demon sends me on binds me to a vampire named Killian, a half-mad, half-naked monster who hates my guts almost as much as he longs to drink my blood.

Killian swore to kill all witches on sight, but we agree to work together to solve the murders ravaging the city. He despises me, and I can’t stand him… but there’s an unexpected connection between us, something I can’t help but be curious about.

No, I can’t let anything distract me. Not even a hot and enraging vampire who presses all of my freaking buttons. I’m determined to find my parents’ killers, and stop the chaos taking over the supernatural world.

If only love didn’t get in the way.

A delicious slow-burn enemies to lovers novel, The Darkest Vampire is a new adult urban fantasy that’s full of dark romance, adventure, and twists you won’t see coming. Fans of Linsey Hall, Leia Stone, and Jaymin Eve are going to become obsessed with this brand-new paranormal series by Juliana Haygert!

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EXCERPT:

The smoke disappeared and I gasped as I took the figure in—a man. A half-naked, half-mad man, with murder written all over his face. He was large, with wide shoulders and very ripped arms, rags for clothes, and an attack stance.

“What—?”

I didn’t have time to say or ask anything.

The man moved like the wind. In a flash, he had his hand around my throat and my back pressed against the bookshelf. Panic laced its way around my spine as I fought his steel-like grip, my legs dangling and my feet off the ground. My flashlight slipped from my hand.

“H—“ I tried telling him to stop, to listen, but my voice wouldn’t come out.

He snarled at me and in the near dark, all I could see were the dark veins around his dark eyes and his fangs—two long fangs. Holy shit, he was a vampire. The panic tightened around me. I had never seen a vampire before but I had heard they were fast and vicious and dangerous.

The vampire’s gaze fell to my neck.

Oh, shit.

I swung my legs and kicked him in the thigh—or at least, I tried to. He probably felt nothing more than a scratch. But it had been enough to take his attention from my neck. His eyes locked on mine as he snarled again.

Then, as quickly as he came, he backed off.

My feet hit the floor with such impact, I thought I would kiss the carpet, but I was able to hold on to the bookshelf and stay upright. My lungs screamed as I inhaled deeply.

I grabbed the dagger from inside my boot and pointed at the vampire. “Stay where you are or I’ll use this.” I was sure I couldn’t really hurt him if he didn’t allow me, but it was all I could do not to panic some more.

The vampire took two slow steps back, his eyes wide, his hand over his heart. “It’s you,” he rasped.


 

Author Bio:

While Juliana Haygert dreams of being Wonder Woman, Buffy, or a blood elf shadow priest, she settles for the less exciting–but equally gratifying–life of a wife, mother, and author. She resides in North Carolina and spends her days writing about kick-ass heroines and the heroes who drive them crazy.

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